Saturday 7 March 2009

Confessions...

I have thought about just not mentioning this, but after re-reading all those amazing comments I received for my last post, I realised that I would be cheating not only myself but all of you.

So after the gym I came home and pretty much collapsed onto the sofa.  I spent the evening in this weird shaky state.  I just could not stop my knees wobbling and getting head rushes whenever I got up.  I know it was not that I did not eat enough, as I have eaten far less than that before.  This is not my way of trying to make excuses by the by, I am just giving you the background leading to it.  I am sure you have all guessed by now that I am talking about eating last night when I said to myself and all you guys via my blog, that I would not.  I know this is a bit 'rambly', sorry.  My bingelet was not horrific and i will not pretend that I am freaking out, because strangely enough I am not.  Is that weird?  I ended up having 2 small bowls of organic gnocchi and red pesto.  I worked it out and it was around the 800 cals mark.  Which for only two small bowls seems a load.

I think the reason I am not freaked out is that I took it all into consideration.  I had had about 6 hours of sleep in 72 hours, I spend most my working days (which are usually 10 - 13 hours) on my feet, i walk everywhere, I have been to the gym alot (for me) and worked really hard (for me) and usually on almost no food, and I was craving carbs.  So yea, I felt I need to be completely honest.  I immediately felt better, and I ate very slowly so as not to full out binge, but sometimes it is just necessary.

So yea.  I feel better getting that off my chest.  

I need to split as I promised I would meet with L to run some errands, I will absolutely post later and comment on all bogs of course.

Sorry again for letting you (and myself down), but I am actually managing the emotions well for me, so that is a positive for once!

Much love girlies,

Ella xx

5 comments:

  1. The number one priority is that you keep yourself safe! You definitely didn't let anyone down-- I would be MUUUUUUUUUUCH more upset if I heard that you were sick.

    Have fun with L.

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  2. Agreed, no one is let down and luckily, the amazing thing about this weight loss obsession we have is that you can fix it tomorrow. Nothing to freak out about, just fix it tomorrow- the mantra i live by :) good luck little lady-:)

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  3. Yeah freaking out does no good... And like AnaBS said, there's ALWAYS tomorrow! I always keep this in mind as well!

    And I still think you're doing fabulously! :-)

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  4. I think you were smart to look at it the way you did. Seems like in the situation, you are totally in the "OK" and you did it right by not eating way fast. And like the other girls, tomorrow's another day!

    Great post :)

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  5. Carbs will just give you LOTS of energy to run off. I've done similar things. Ended well :)

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